How to properly set priorities in life

What are your priorities in life? How do you rank your life priorities? How do you determine what is more important? Are you living according to your life priorities? Is there a universal human hierarchy of priorities? Is it essential to know about it and coordinate your priorities with universal ones? Is it worth living according to an order of priorities and values? I often ask these questions to people sitting in front of me (both online and offline) and who entrusted me with their experiences, existential searches, contradictions, and problems.


First, when I ask such questions, I give people the opportunity to think and write down their life priorities in order of importance, what is essential for them in life, how they spend their time, energy, and material resources. And I get very different answers. Several of them (with the consent of the authors and preservation of anonymity) I present below:


“...parents, health, husband/relationship with him, money” (Jess, 40, married, no children).

“... self-realization, being useful to people, husband, church, children” (Magdalena, 28, married, one child).

“...children, relations with her husband, people around her – relatives, friends” (Maria, 32 years old, two children).

“...financial viability, health, family, happiness, pleasure” (Seth, 43, married).

“... parents, own spiritual harmony, love, vision, interest in life” (Murray, 36, married, one child).


I maintain that everyone has the right to their understanding and choices, but how effective is their life response to these choices? A conversation starts and, as a result, I propose to think about the system of life priorities, which, in my opinion, is the most constructive. Note - I do not impose but suggest reflection. Again, I do not insist on recognizing this system as the best; I emphasize practicality, consistency, and effectiveness.


How to set your life priorities correctly

Before I present this system of life priorities to you, I must make a statement. The paradigm derives from and stands on two crucial postulates:


• the meaning of human life is the constant personal evolution (development);

• the most critical aspect in any person's life is the relationships he /she builds, maintains, cherishes. Everything derives and flows from relationships, through relationships and for the sake of relationships.


Whatever you do, it is crucial to verify if that contributes to your personal growth or improvement of your relationships.


So, I offer you a system of life priorities, a logical sequence that includes the following: Spirituality, Myself, Couple, Family (Children), Work, Everything else (extended family, friends, hobbies, etc.)



Priority # 1 - Spirituality

The first is Spirituality. It is the cornerstone, guiding star, standards, values, moral compass, strength, inspiration, source of life, etc. Spirituality is the most crucial landmark in life priorities! The life of each of us is the product of our decisions and our values. Even without being very spiritual, we feel when we make a mistake and think about the consequences. Why? Because we live in a world where there are universal spiritual laws.

Spirituality helps to develop the most critical thing in every person - inner character, personality traits, a chain of endless victories over oneself. For sceptics, atheists and those oriented towards success, measured by material results and money: both the first and the second choices are the results of internal changes! As Jordan Peterson says: "I am not the best compared to others; I am the best compared to who I was yesterday!" And we change thanks to an effective system of priorities, in which moral standards always remain constant and are the most correct.